Torrential Kinsey's Journal
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Below are the 18 most recent journal entries recorded in
Torrential Kinsey's LiveJournal:
| Wednesday, August 17th, 2005 | | 11:26 am |
There are so many people to sincerely disapprove of that it would be a waste to bother and record them. I don't imagine that things are going to get a lot better any time soon, either. I would remove myself from this society altogether and become a monk, but I'm sure Eros would hear none of it. On that note, I have go to make travel arrangements to visit some of the people that I dislike the most in order to exorcise a major demon, so don't expect anything more cheerful in the near future. | | Wednesday, May 25th, 2005 | | 7:47 pm |
I am reacting to what I am expressly discouraged from directly mentioning with suppressed disgust. I can't imagine how people expect to fare in the afterlife if they cannot master the simple task of considering the feelings and fates of others. I love you, Eros. Wolfe, perhaps it would be sagacious to change your username. | | Saturday, January 1st, 2005 | | 10:13 pm |
I would appreciate it if you would all kindly stop laughing at us. | | Wednesday, December 29th, 2004 | | 5:13 pm |
A bit over-zealous to diagnose, aren't they? | | Wednesday, December 22nd, 2004 | | 11:44 pm |
I don't trust in people any more. It was ridiculous to try and I always thought it. Leon thought it necessary to literally force me from the cemetery. I wouldn't personally view Leon as an expert on what are healthy behaviors and what are not, but my opinion rarely matters to anyone excluding myself. He fed me sedative-laced hot chocolate and I ought to be furious with him. I shouldn't be surprised that Eros equates a relationship with sexual intimacy. His name was intended to be a sign to me, but of course I chose to ignore it. He's hurtful and hateful and he never appreciates any of my ideas or anything I try to do for him or anyone else. Quite frankly, everyone absolutely despises me or is thoroughly fed up with me by now. I would commit suicide, but it's defeatist and over-dramatic, not to mention ugly. As angry as I am at Leon, he's remarkably comforting. I will make mention of it to him and thank him for it. But I wasn't really that cold. In my medical opinion I would have been perfectly fine. | | Monday, November 8th, 2004 | | 4:52 pm |
Eros is strenuously and most childishly refusing to accept the decision to modify the apartment into a reliquary. He just doesn't appreciate the delicacy of negotiations or the difficulty in mediating the desires of saints and secular beings. Every direction that I've been guided has proven to be beneficial, but I suppose that Eros doesn't view it as such. I shudder to consider what would likely be my current position if there hadn't been the intervention. Heedlessly greedy and wrathful, no doubt. Currently, I'm trying to compromise the request as the conversion of a single room, but results are less than promising. Perhaps they will consider the lease of an additional apartment satisfactory. | | Sunday, October 17th, 2004 | | 11:13 am |
I admit only in my deepest, most secret of chambers that the sermon we attended this morning was undeniably dull. Leon seems to have taken comfort from it, however, and that was its intended purpose, so I have no right to complain. It seems to have inexplicably rendered him rather sugary and attentive of Raphael. I don't know how many times I've told him to take things slow and simple on himself. He doesn't likely realize how often he ignores my advice but still it's irritating all the same. If he ever intends to improve in any manner whatsoever he'll start seriously considering the value of proper physical and spiritual maintenance. Leon is now demanding that I decease in neglecting certain aspects of my life which in reality I do not. Everyone is so caught up in preconceived notions of my behavior. I don't know where they get these ideas from. It is certain that they don't derive them from any religious text or divine enlightenment. | | Friday, October 8th, 2004 | | 7:56 am |
I remain uninspired of what to do with Raphael and Leon. Demons and sinners though they are, it's on my head if I am unable to help them. I will have to be faithful and persistant. My brother has been behaving in a most disturbing fashion. He has corrupted himself further and taken up pornography as as pastime. I don't understand what could possibly influence him to engage in these disgusting habits of his. Of course, when I confronted him about it, he thought my concern amusing. And needless to say, it has become very difficult to restrain myself about him. I rather hoped that he would mature with age, as the rest of us do. Everyone is insisting that I partake in a meal, so I must go. | | Thursday, May 6th, 2004 | | 9:03 am |
Watch, O Lord, with those who wake, or watch, or weep tonight, and give your angels charge over those who sleep. Tend your sick ones, O Lord Christ. Rest your weary ones. Bless your dying ones. Soothe your suffering ones. Pity your afflicted ones. Shield your joyous ones. And for all your love's sake. Amen. | | Friday, April 9th, 2004 | | 3:32 pm |
Since I have become sincerely Come as I have become comely Weary as the wheel turns Fearful as the spirit spurns In You, the sound repeats, distorted Through, thorough, thought | | Sunday, March 21st, 2004 | | 1:56 pm |
Torrential Truisms
Music is the prompt to sing. Wreckage keeps. The best things are called senseless and are felt with all senses. Only the very old and very new can make you cry. | | Wednesday, March 17th, 2004 | | 9:51 am |
My father departed this world six days ago. He died violently and without comfort. We brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. The Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the Name of the Lord. (1 Timothy 6. 7. Job 1. 21.) | | Thursday, March 11th, 2004 | | 9:48 pm |
Apparently, there has been some lack of understanding among the people who replied to my last entry. I am -not- ill and am perfectly capable of fending for myself under most circumstances. And I am -not- neglecting you, Eros, I am maintaining a healthy level of independence. What exactly have I done to warrant this unnecessary concern? I appreciate that you all think of me kindly and do not wish to see me grievously injured, but I believe that it is safe for me to act out my daily routines and rituals. | | Wednesday, March 10th, 2004 | | 10:40 pm |
Eros is holding me captive within my own home, claiming that I am mentally unwell and asserting that I should avoid exerting myself in my delicate psychological state. I ceaselessly threaten him with scenarios derived from -The Yellow Wallpaper-, but to no avail. Of course, the idea of him having read that story in the first place is preposterous, so I suppose that while the threat itself holds merit, it holds significantly less for him. And as he believes me to already be quite unhinged, it perhaps does not make as much of an impression as it could. Still, I find the situation quite frustrating. Dangerous poltergeists ought not to be left to their own devices... there's no measuring exactly how much damage a single one of them could commit within a mere matter of days. I shall have to conceive of an alternate plea for reason. | | Sunday, March 7th, 2004 | | 4:58 pm |
Eros seems suspiciously exhausted whenever I suggest that he study the bible with me. I don't believe his sleeping in every Sunday morning is of entire coincidence. Horrid dreams last night, but refreshingly new. Honestly, my dreams would suggest that I'm the most helpless being on this planet. Note to self: While a secular and superficial concern, it is never, ever wise to agree to someone else dressing you, despite that Eros might tell you otherwise. | | Friday, March 5th, 2004 | | 3:53 pm |
The rain is surely meant to leave me in awe. While the rain itself was a light mist that still clings to my clothing, the wind was furious, and at the end of my walk my hands were rendered useless, as they fumbled with everything they touched. Any attempt to warm them quickly resulted in sharp, shooting pains. Biting cold, as the phrase would have it. Papa hasn't learned to not call me, which is why we remain in contact. She's quite astounded that I'm not as nosy about Thorough's boyfriend as she is. Frankly, if I needed to know anything about him, I could just ask her. There's no sense in prying. This weekend, I refuse to have only spare moments to devote to Eros. If there's something that you need from me, please postpone it, unless it must be done most urgently. | | Wednesday, March 3rd, 2004 | | 9:14 pm |
Rachel sent me this user picture featuring stigmata. I do not possess the gift and burden that is stigmata, but I am fascinated by it. Thank you, Rachel. I have been neglecting my exorcist duties, having been shamefully absorbed in myself. I will try to focus my attentions to my secular surroundings to avoid selfishness. | | Monday, March 1st, 2004 | | 4:39 pm |
I am drifting. As devout as I was, it could not dissuade my mind from cruel and haughty notions. I do not believe in coincidence. My actions are returned with the reactions of God. I pray, for I touch little here and touch much there. It is all I can do. The rising, the falling Be known Those untouched by the cracks in the universe Shall be punished with the cold of the wavering hand |
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